Something else that's really been catching my attention these last few weeks is... Problems. Problems, and the way that people deal with them. Everyone has their own personal issues... I really mean EVERYONE. I bet that there's not one person in the world that doesn't. Strange thought, isn't it. Especially during these last couple of weeks I've really been taking notice of what the people around me consider wrong about their lives. One was having trouble with her relationship, the other's unhappy about lack of a relationship, the other's unhappy with'r looks, the other's having trouble because her ex just started seeing someone else, and... I mean, look around you. Think of what your own friends and loved ones are going through.. Every one of them is facing their own struggle.
I think it's human nature. We need those problems. It's those bumps in the road that make our lives interesting, give it a certain significance. Plus, they really emphasise the happy moments in our lives. The sugar wouldn't be as sweet, without the sour. Or: The Glory of Contrast, as I like to call it. Food tastes better after you've gotten hungry, light seems brighter after darkness, explosions in music are more appreciated after a break, and even insignificant things like taking a dump relieve alot more when you've had to hold it up for a while. Contrast, my friends!! This also reminds me of something Marieke once said, which has really stuck by me.. I'll translate it for you, because it sounds so much better in English ;p

"Embrace your misery,
 for it is the misery that enables the euphoria of the rare blissful moments that make life worthwhile."

(I guess this also kinda explains why I'm so fond of that girl )
Anyway, I hope you understand what I'm getting at. And try to keep this in mind the next time 't you're feeling blue? (note the new theme and it's color ;) )
The thing is, we're never really satisfied! Even if/when we don't have a reason to complain about our current situation, we'd be complaining that we can't get to an even better place. It's never, quite, good enough. But then again: maybe we should be greatful for being like that. Just imagine that we could actually be satisfied with what we have. (Yeah... that'll happen.. [sarcasm]) It would be the end of evolution! We NEED ideals to strive for in order to keep growing. Maybe that's why animals never grew to our level... Maybe it's because they're satisfied with their existing situation, that it CAN be good enough. 'Live their lives at a simpler level, with less contrast... I mean, if you really start thinking about it that way, all evolution has really done for us is make things more complicated... Now we have jobs to chase after, health care insurance, mortgages and other finances, and not to mention our complex sexual traditions. You won't see animals taking the time to ask someone out, no, they just get on top! :P

Current mood: Mellow
Current song playing: Explosions in the Sky - Catastrophe and the Cure
Current MSN-name quote: "What difference does indifference make"

Hello again everyone! ^^ I've got some news for you; good news and... great news :P

I guess I should start off with that announcement that I was talking about in my previous "update"..! ;) I don't care whether you want to know what it is, 'cause I'm gonna be telling you anyway:
I am ONE LUCKY MOTHERFUCKER!! :D
YEAH!!

Well.. That's pretty much it. Thanks for readin'.

Okay okay okay, for real this time..! :P I did mean what I said just now, but there's a REASON for it! It's about New Zealand... I think pretty much all of you have already heard about my plans to do my internship there this spring, but there have been a few complication concerning these plans. I've already discussed this issue with a few of you, and I've had to explain it TOO MANY TIMES lately! But, I'm writing all of this right now to tell you that I've finally reached a definite decision... Let me fill you in on the complications first, quick and easy.

Alright, so according to school, we're supposed to do our internship from January 29th to June 15th. That's 19 weeks. But if I wanted New Zealand to come through, I wouldn't have been able to commence my internship by end February/begin March, which would prevent me from being back home for our exams at school! I'm in the second year of my education right now, and you CAN finish it in those two years.. So to get right down to it, doing my internship in New Zealand would mean that I'd have to keep up my current education for one more year.
This means that I was given an ultimatum. I had two choices:

 1: I'm going through with New Zealand, and choose to proceed with my current education for one more year (I wouldn't have to repeat it: proceed it). This would also mean that I'd MISS the spring and summer here in Holland, and spend autumn and winter in NZ instead...
 2: I quickly rush through this education, do my internship here in Holland like a regular person, get my diploma, get a quick job and gather enough money to go by myself AFTER the summer, no strings attached.

Both sides had both they advantages and disadvantages.. I mean, if I were to go 'n get my diploma first, I would be free from school, be able to move to the city, get a job and be independent from anyone! However, this would still be connected to a few risks.. What if I were to cancel my NZ plans and try to get my diploma and fail at the last moment and STILL be forced to continue one more year..?! That'd be pretty fucked up, pardon my French. And if I were to go through with NZ, I would have some certainty, have enough time to prepare everything, AND! It would even SAVE me some money. If I go to NZ during my education, my scholarship would still keep going AND I'd have a payed internship, causing me to be able to stay there a lot LONGER for less money. If I were to go AFTER my education I could stay there for like 2, maybe 3 months TOPS, and my savingsaccount would be gone completely. But I WOULD have gone there for the country itself. Then again, it'd be a little creepy not to have a solid base in a place I've never been.

I'm sure that every single one of you has heard of the saying "time is money". What the hell does that have to do with this?
Alot, actually. Evidently, I had the choice of these two.. Time, or money: Save one year of my life, and pay a bit more to get there.. OR just take my time and prepare everything to the fullest, and spend LESS money to stay there alot LONGER, using my scholarship and my payed internship to cover expenses.
You have no idea how difficult it's been to "cut the knot" and make a decision. At first, I had my mind set on the first option, but got convinced by my family to option two, but eventually changed my mind back again! But I didn't want to go through with it without the approval of my family. I've spent hours, days, even weeks thinking about this, constantly thinking about this. My family insisted and even (financially) threatened me to finish my education first, but I still wanted to go through with it...!

THE ANSWER
EVERYBODY WINS!!! :D The decision has been made.. I turns out that my family didn't understand my financial situation, they thought that my scholarship would end if I didn't finish college this very year! I've tried to tell them that it wouldn't, many times, but I had no idea that they still didn't understand this part!
Now, I will continue Multimedia Design for one more year, but POSTPONING New Zealand back to September. This way I can still fully prepare the trip, AND still get to spend spring and summer here in Holland, then head over to NZ when summer has ended here in Holland and live spring and summer all over again! It's a perfect win-win-situation! Sure, it'll cost me a year, but my education is a very wide one.. I've explored webdesign in and out, but there's still so much to learn: I'll have a top-notch diploma, WITH an internship in NZ on my résumé!
AAANND now I won't have to miss all the awesome festivals and gigs that take place here in Holland this spring/summer! I already have all kinds of gigs planned out right now. Look look look.

Feb 3rd: 30 Seconds to Mars || Tivoli, Utrecht
Feb 23rd: Mutemath || Paradiso, Amsterdam
Feb 24th: OK Go! || Melkweg, Amsterdam
Feb 25th: Explosions in the Sky || Paradiso, Amsterdam
March 4th: Billy Talent || Melkweg, Amsterdam
March 16th: Incubus || Heineken Music Hall, Amsterdam
April 29th: Rise Against || Melkweg, Amsterdam
May 26-28: Pinkpop || Landgraaf, Limburg
August 17-19: Lowlands || Biddingshuizen, Flevoland

If anyone wants to come with me to any one of these gigs.. You're always MORE than welcome! I'll go on my own if I have to, but I'd really love to have some people by my side to rock out with.

All of this hasn't really gotten through to me just yet, but... What I do know is that-... I AM ONE LUCKY MOTHERFUCKER!! :D