Shoot for the moon
and you might come even further than what you thought you were capable of.

...For the only thing worse than missing something you desire,
 

is knowing that you could've had it.

I'm addicted. To passion.

Live the present, in both the future and the past.

Good morning everyone (:

Man, that update I wrote yesterday really got my writing-spirit back up..! Regular readers might already have noticed that I haven't been writing at all lately, but I must say that it really felt great to get back into it like that yesterday. Writing that particular update felt very different than I remembered, actually. Maybe it's the different writing-style, I don't know. I don't remember ever writing in that particular state of mind before, it was an amazing evening for me.

And I must admit that I really missed that feeling you get, the morning after spending an evening writing about things. It feels very similar to the feeling you get when you just had a really good conversation with someone. One of those really rare conversations, in which you barely even think about what you're saying and the words just seem to come straight from the origin of who you are. I've come to believe that those are the only moments that we're ever really ourselves. Normally you're always thinking about what would be the most appropriate thing to do, say or be. Why do we always keep adjusting ourselves like that? Why is there always something or someone we feel we have to live up to?

I'm sorry, I've only just found out what state of mind I'm in right now. This is going to be a long update... But I'm sure you'd be used to that by now, aye? ;)

Right! First off, let me start by explaining what I meant with the title of that last update. Because, like I said; "And not just this particular period of time in my life, but also the different memories that made me into who I am today". I spent that update explaining the memories - now let me spend this one explaining just what's so damn special about "this particular period of time".

Yeah, I guess that - with my absence from writing lately - I've got some explaining to do, about my current situation. Because to be honest, no 'really big things' have happened to make my situation all that different from what it was a few months ago, when I wrote my (second-)last update. The only thing that HAS really changed, is the way I look at it. And with that, the way I feel about it. It might have something to do with my grandfather not being there anymore when I returned home from New Zealand, I'm not sure, but "home" just hasn't been the same for me ever since I got back.
 I was expecting to come back home, finish up my education in July, get that diploma, move out and move on with my life. Unfortunately, things worked out a little different...

Acquiring my diploma turned out to be a lot more of a hassle than I initially thought. The details aren't even relevant enough to get into, but to summarise a long, bullshit story, I was not allowed to take part in the exams last July. With these exams only taking place twice every year, this now means that I won't get another chance to do so until January.
 It's been a great disappointment for me, to not live up to my own expectations like that. One that I was too proud to share with anyone, to be perfectly honest with you... I guess it's good that I'm finally admitting this here. It's quite a relief :)

"But wait a second, I thought you said you were so happy with 'this period of time in your life'?"
And I am! I honestly am. The extra time gave me a lot more time to determine exactly just what direction I wanted to go, and make all the needed preparations. And I'm pretty sure that every one of you that really knows me, will know that I've always liked to take my time with... Well, with pretty much everything, really! :P I've really come to acknowledge this particular trait of mine lately, and I know that not everyone appreciates this quality about me. Especially Renske, but that would be a different story ;) It's a part of who I am. I couldn't change it if I wanted to, and I wouldn't change it if I could!

So what direction do I want my life to go?! That's a very good question Adrian, and I'd be happy to answer it for you. But before we get into that, I think it's important to realize the importance of realizing that it's important (:P) not to focus on the future too much. It shouldn't always be about where you're going - from time to time a person just needs to stand still and appreciate where he's standing right there and then. Because what's more important? Reaching your ideals, or the way you got there?

So where am I now, then? I'm glad you ask. I'm not just finding out where I want to be going, but also learning the importance of appreciating just working on getting there. And that's what you're doing right now; actively working on your future. Determined, but not solely fixed upon your goal. Enjoying all that you've previously experienced - not just accomplished: experienced - you're enjoying the experiences you're doing up, while working on accomplishing even more! I'm working on working a job that I'll enjoy doing, so that I'll eventually be able to see even more of the world. Maybe even to support a family one day. I'm working a working a job, in a lovely town where I feel comfortable living with a social life that took years to bring about. I'm in love again. I'm going to concerts, witnessing all the artists perform the music that helps making the atmoshere in my life into what it is. I just lived on the other side of our planet for half a year! What more could a person want?!

More. That's what. We always do. Which is okay, as long as you never forget to really appreciate what has been. And besides; what would life be, if we stopped wanting?

 ...then what does?

Good day everyone!
I'm in an awfully good mood today, and I've got quite a few reasons to be. The only one that's relevant to this particular space-update, is that I've just received another message from one of my "traveling buddies" from New Zealand. A fantastic reminder of a fantastic time. Thought it was about time for me to FINALLY write about that last and most amazing month down there, ey? I'm very sorry to have kept it waiting for as long as I have, but just bear with me okay? ;) Before I even start writing all of this, I'd like to warn you that this is probably gonna be a very long story... Of course, by the time you're reading this, you'd probably already have scrolled fown to see just how big it is. Then why am I even typing this? 'Not a clue. Not a clue...
 Oh, I know! I just wanted to remind you that I don't EXPECT any of you to read this. It's for those of you that really care, are plane curious, enjoy reading, or are just really bored ;P I've already said this several times before but the main reason that I keep this blog updated, is for myself. Just don't feel obliged to read this (:

SO! Where to start the documentation of this lifechanging journey? The beginning, might be a good idea. My last update from New Zealand was the one I wrote about Rhythm&Vines, the first festival in the world to see the sunrise in 2008. Yes, what an amazing week that was... I wrote that update just a few days before I finished my internship at KIWA. Seems like a good place to start, yes? It may already be quite a while ago, but I remember all of it as if happened yesterday. Or two days, at most ;)
 Well, enough with the introduction - let's get this ball rolling, shall we? You might remember me going on and on about all the plans I'd made, now let me tell you how the all worked out.

______________________________

Friday, 18th of January... This had been a day I'd been looking forward to for a very long time. It was my last day working at KIWA Productions, and this was an occasion worth celebrating. In fact, I was gonna be celebrating it that very evening with the Kings of Leon in Wellington! Little more than a week after Rhythm&Vines, it was time for another concert. And another one, AND another one!! Kings of Leon that Friday, The National on Tuesday, and Big Day Out the Friday after that!! One big week of celebration... I said my goodbyes to Dee, Lincoln, Jacob & Daniel, since I wouldn't see them for more than a month, and took the bus over to Wellington. Lincoln had given me his old backback, which was a bit more practical than my suitcase on wheels, but a backpack this heavy really took some getting used to; the effect of gravity of 20 extra kilograms on your back tends to have its effect on your balance... Just for the record, I'm used to having people on my back and neck, but they usually get climb back down to solid ground after 5 or 10 minutes. This backpack was gonna be a 5th (or 6th? :P) limb of my body for the next 40 days, so I'd better get used to it.

I still remember that bus ride over to Wellington as if it happened yesterday, when in fact it's a good 3 months ago already...! It's incredible. I really miss that place, I really do. Being back home has been great and all, but. Well, a major difference is that when you're away, you get this certain image in your head of what home was like, or rather what you THINK home was like when you left. The way you want it to be. This provides you with a certain kind of freedom of interpreting your life back home, which I think is a big part of the beauty of travel. You're leading a second life somewhere far away from home, where you know you can afford to try all kinds of new things. Because even if it DOES go wrong, you'll always have your life back home to fall back on. You've already succeeded back there, and you can rebuild so much in this new place, only WITH the knowledge of your old life. Call it a reincarnation of yourself, if you will.
 While staring out of the window from my seat in that bus, admiring the wonderful New Zealand landscapes and shorelines while enjoying some good ol' Dave Matthews, you reflect on your "old life" back home and just sit there enjoying the moment. In some sort of trance, you realize what an amazing addition this is to your life as it already was, understanding the lack of boundaries of where you want your life to go. These bus trips can never last long enough if you ask me.

Arriving in Wellington somewhere in the early afternoon, I headed right down to the backpackers' where I was gonna be satying that night, dropped off my stuff and headed right back into the city. This was only my second time in "Welly", yet somehow I felt perfectly at home. I'd been here before to see the Black Seeds again, and after that FANTASTIC welcome Wellington gave me that weekend, the city just felt like a second home to me. I didn't feel like a tourist AT ALL anymore. After having reacquainted myself with the city, I headed over to the docks to do something I had to skip the last time I was there; I rented a pair of rollerblades and spent the next 3 hours skating all the way through Windy Wellington's harbour! It was fantastic, I hadn't rolled around on those things since I was 12! That's TEN YEARS, people. Now THAT'S getting in touch with your old life ;) I also rolled by the TSB Arena where the Kings of Leon were gonna be playing that night. It wasn't another 3 hours until they'd actually get onstage and there were already people waiting at the doors. Thought it might be time for me to grab me some dinner and get in line, so I did...

By the time I'd finished dinner and got my butt back to the venue, there was already a HUGE line waiting right there, it was ridiculous. But still, even in the line, the atmosphere was there: everyone in that line was in for some good, raw, live rock. Most of you reading this will know what this feels like, so it won't be mich of a surprise that it wasn't a problem at all to wait for about an hour surrounded by these people. My kind of people... I didn't know a single person in there when I headed over there, but somehow it always seems to be a mere matter of time until that changes miraculously. Especially after actually getting inside and waiting for the band, people walked up to me who recognized me from either Rhythm&Vines or even from Hawera! And, of course, people who just thought they'd make some "original" remark about my height; how could you ever grow tired of people asking you how tall you are.
 Apart from some girl who threw up three times just to pass out right into her breakfast from last morning, the atmosphere in the crowd was fantastic. I can't tell you how much I'd missed times like these, it was a great reminder of my personal highlight of last year's Lowlands. It couldn't possibly have topped that particular experience, but it came pretty close! Third time to see these guys playing, but I honestly don't see how you could ever grow tired of witnessing it. Their support-act, Youth Group, made sure of this. Great stuff.
 Once the gig was over, I went way to the back just to rehydrate and calm-the-hell-down with some other guys that I'd met up front while we were jumping shoulder-to-shoulder. We got to talking and I agreed to head into town with their group afterwards... This turned out to be quite a night, it was wild! A great group to be hangin'out with, though not all of them seemed as "intellectual" as the others. Still, I had some great conversations with them and other people we met at the clubs where we were at. And the best part was; I really felt "respected", you know? I remember one of these guys, Mike, bit older than I was, talking to one of his friends about me. How they met me at the concert and how much he enjoyed "listening to his stories". The sincerity (or the alcohol) in his voice really meant a lot to me at the time :)
 They couldn't dance for much, but I remember this one guy that was grooving out next to me on the dance floor and he was copying all of my moves! Was pretty cool to see someone "learning" from you like that, but once he got them down it was fantastic: it was like I was dancing in a mirror. I reckon it must've looked pretty cool until the guy made pass at me! I'm not gonna state what he told me exactly, but he seemed quite fond of the fact that I was dancing with my shirt open... I couldn't believe my ears, hoping I misunderstood him due to the loud music. "WHAT?!" I replied, and he just backed off: "Never mind, never mind", as I re-buttoned my shirt while reconvincing myself of my "sexual preference". Gah.

I got back to my hostel at around 5 in the morning, sliiightly intoxicated. Normally you'd have to be checked out of the hostel by 10am, but this time around, I'd planned an extra day/night for recovery, and I'm GLAD that I did! Most of this day (or at least what was left of it) was spent relaxing on the beach and just chilling out. Enjoying some great fresh memories, organizing them and giving them a spot in my mind. In the evening I suddenly felt like watching a good movie and decided to head over to the cinema to see what was playing. I'd been wanting to check out I Am Legend and it was JUST what I needed! Blew me away. Fantastic. And a huge coincidence; after the movie I walked back down the stairs and ran into that Mike-guy from last night, with some others from that night. They seemed in even worse shape than I was, but it was great 't we got to say our goodbyes like that.

After that, it was on to Auckland for the next couple of gigs! That Monday, after ALMOST having missed my train to Auckland (those cabs everywhere CAN some in handy sometimes), I was rolling on a railroad straight through the center of the North Island. It felt pretty good to be back in a train again.. I hadn't expected this feeling at all, but being back in a train like this, it kinda felt like home, really. It didn't have those typical orange benches like the ones we have back here of course, but still - the train still feels like "my territory"! After all those bus- and planetrips, I could honestly say that.. I'd missed this :) I spent most of the trip reading and talking the people around me. I had an older couple of European South Africans behind me and I think I must've spent at least 2 hours talking to these people. The stories from that country are astounding: so different from what we're used to. So much chaos. Nowhere on the world have different cultures clashed as much as they have there, it's kinda sad. I stand by my opinion that we had no right to invade their country and force our Western lifestyle upon those people. But that's a different story!! I'll probably get a bit deeper into this subject once I've actually been there myself. A matter of time ;)

I had initially planned to stay with my aunt&uncle up there in Auckland, but I hadn't been able to get a hold of them in time. But since they lived way out of the city, and my concerts were way in the center, I figured it would be better for the both of us to find and book a hostel somewhere in the city. However, finding one proved to be a bit more of a challenge than I initially had anticipated. With Big Day Out coming up this Friday, almost EVERY hostel I found was booked way up to they maximum capacity. Remember this was Auckland, a city inhabiting HALF of NZ's total population. A city counting well over 2 million people, with NO available hostels at all..?!?! No way, man! No way. After some intense searching, I finally managed to find this great place, right next to the Sky Tower. And a cheaper one at that: $18 NZD per night, which would account for about €9 per night! Perfect!
 Still, nothing could've given me an idea of what I was in for over at that hostel. It was fantastic; it was like spending a full month with a group of friends I'd known for months. With Big Day Out coming up that Friday, more than HALF of the people staying there were all going to the festival. It was a fantastic bunch of people; all different kinds of people from all different places around the world. I had two roommates, Ross & Jim from England, which were little younger than I was (although little Ross looked like a bloody 12-year-old :P). I got along with these two from the very minute I walked into my room and I spent every next day of my week in Auckland with these follows, including Big Day Out itself. I could on about this single week for about an hour, but I'll just let the pictures do the talking. I'm not sure how much longer this update will become, but if you scroll down to the bottom of it, you should see the photo's down there. Provided that I haven't forgotten to add them...
 The part that I still want to explain in detail, is that very last day in Auckland. I had reserved one extra day in Auckland after BDO for "physical and mental recovery", just like I'd done back in Welly, and apparently most people at the hostel had done the same. This last day/night together turned out to be almost as good as BDO itself..! See, what happened is... On that last night, our whole BDO-group was hanging out together on the balcony one last time. The manager let us stay up there until 1am, rather than the normal 10pm. So he was already cutting us some slack, but when the time actually came, none of us were really prepared to call it a night, so we decided to hit the town instead. But rather than going to some random pub, we all just went ahead and bought our own beer and took this to the nearest park. We didn't even have any music or whatever, yet we sat there for hours! The police even came by because apparently we weren't allowed to drink in that particular park, but they were real easy on us, really kind, and we even got a big group photo with'm :P I'll add that photo to the rest, it's fantastic :D You can see the cop way on the right, be sure to check it out! They told us to leave, but they just left after we told them that we would. ...We never really got out of that park until another 2 hours later :P But would you just look at that photo for a minute?! I mean, we've got some Germans in there, Englishmen, some tall Dutch guy, Canadians, Aussie's, a few actual Kiwi's and... Just look at those facial expressions! Look at the absolute joy in those faces! Isn't that what it's all about? It's one of my best memories of the whole trip and I'm so, so glad that we got it photographed like that. And that's not even the whole group!

That next Sunday morning, that whole little "family" we had going on parted ways again, and we barely even got to say our goodbyes. We had to be checked out by 11am, and with the lack of sleep from the last night, most of us seemed to have some trouble getting up... Some just didn't, and decided to stay one more day, just for the sake of sleeping in. Would've been well worth it, but I had a flight to catch that afternoon! Off to the South Island at last... My hunger for live music had been well fed, and now it was time for me to get right down to nature! Into The Wild. I'd managed to get a hold of my uncle the day before, and had agreed to meet up them in the park. Albert Park, which I'd grown so utterly fond of. There's something about those "mid-urban parks", I don't know. It's where everyone goes to get away from the suburban city chaos, which creates a certain kind of atmosphere, and a sense of unity with everyone there. I haven't found a better reading spot in Auckland, than this certain tree in this particular park. I read my books in there, but to oppose some recent rumours, I DID NOT spend the night in any of those trees!
 Anyhow, I was real glad to still get to see my uncle & aunt again during my second stay in Auckland. I hadn't seen them since I headed down to Hawera, just a week after arriving in New Zealand. It was great to catch up, while enjoying a warm, sunny, little picnic in the park. Also, they said they were willing to drive me over to the airport to catch my flight, giving us a few extra hours to enjoy in the park.
 The thing was, though... We got so carried away talking, that we completely lost track of time. My flight left at 5 o'clock, and we headed over there at about 4. I was sure that it wouldn't be much of a problem, until I heard how far it was: 35 kilometers?! They had been keeping a close eye on the time but it turned out that, due to a little misunderstanding, they though that I had to CHECK IN at 5pm, when my flight would actually be LEAVING at that time! When they found out, they started stressing about how we'd never make it in time and all that, and... Well, to be honest with you, I just couldn't be bothered to worry about it :P A major lack of sleep, combined with the satisfaction of a fantastic festiva-.. of a fantastic WEEK, made sure of it that I just sat there, going "Aahh, whatever man, it'll be fiiine".
 BUT! No it won't :D We arrived at the Domestic Terminal at about 10 to 5, dragged my equipment over to check-in, just to find out that the plane was already boarded. I had managed to catch every bus and train in New Zealand so far, but it just would've been unnatural if I didn't miss SOMETHING, SOMEWHERE along the trip, right? :P

Thankfully, the Air New Zealand staff was very helpful to reschedule my flight for me. It did cost me a little extra, but I still couldn't care... After that last week, nothing could go wrong anymore anyway. I could tell that the woman that was helping me quite enjoyed my state of mind, since most people in line got all fussy about it. And here was this huge, tired, satisfied hippie with this big grin on his face going "Aahh, sure, whatever, take your time". People often tell me I don't worry as much as I should sometimes, but this is a habit I'm most proud of ;)
 I couldn't get a flight for that same day anymore, but got the first flight on the next day instead. 10am... I called my uncle about how it all went, he seemed to feel a bit guilty but I eventually managed to convince him that it was my responsibility. After talking things through, I decided it would probably be the easiest for the both of us if I just found a hostel somewhere near the airport. He didn't mind picking me up, on the contrary, but I was a bit reluctant to accept any help at this time. I worked my way into this situation, and I'll get my way right back out again. I could just imagine how my mother would've responded to this, I sortof felt the need to prove that it really wasn't that big of a deal.
 So I went to check for hostels in the area but they were all relatively expensive. Still ridiculously low for Dutch standards, but I still didn't feel like paying for it. But then, someone suggested that I could always wait in the internation terminal, which doesn't close overnight..! This sounded perfect! I don't know about you guys, but I'm one of those people that loves airports. I still head over to Schiphol from time to time just to suck up the atmosphere. So I headed back to the International Terminal which I hadn't seen since my arrival in New Zealand. It felt good. I went through the whole building in search of a nice spot to relax for a bit. Read my book, listen some music, sleep a little... Didn't take me long to find a perfect spot for this: some corner way in the corner on the top floor, poorly lit, with some huge windows providing a fantastic view over the runway. No one else there and, best of all, it was free! What else could a man wish for. Well, a bed would've been nice, but the benches weren't half bad, really :) I couldn't help but feel like Tom Hanks in The Terminal, have you seen that movie? You're hereby invited to come watch it at my place!
 Some of you might not believe me on this one, but I really did quite enjoy myself that night! In fact, I'm GLAD that I missed my flight that day, looking back at it now.

That morning I witnessed another hectic day at the airport, slowly picking up it's usual pace. Hundreds of people arriving and leaving home, welcomed or dropped off by family or friends, crying and laughing.. See, that's what I like about airports so much; they always look so formal and tidy, yet it's still always filled with emotions all around you. It's just one of those places where you're always "confronted" with the fact that every person around you has a whole life of their own going on. Their own little world, which is often a lot more similar to our own than most of us would like to admit. It's something that's so easy to neglect, allowing you to keep your eyes fixed on your own life. Life provides more than enough distractions for you to ignore the bigger picture. Because every one of us has to re-invent life and its environment. It seems so unnecessary sometimes, that that cycle keeps being repeated over and over again. But since both life and its environment is constantly changing, I suppose it would be only natural for us to keep being reacquainted with it over and over. Or is that the very cause for it to change in the first place? Are we just trying to adapt to our own changes? That would be what we refer to as "evolution", I guess..? But still, how are we ever gonna get somewhere if we can't even adapt to eachother?
 To me, an airport is just one of those places where you look up from the road your walking on, and to look around you. Where you see the bigger picture of where we, the human race as a whole, is heading - or at least attempt to figure it out. A moment of contemplation.

Just as I was about to discover the reason to our existence, a quick glance at the clock revealed that it was about time for me to check in already! Time flies when you're figuring out the reason of life. I packed up my stuff again, and off we went! Into the air, into the clouds, and hopefully not into any tall buildings.

I got off in Christchurch, where I hopped right onto my next flight to Invercargill; the very bottom of the South Island. New Zealand's asshole XD I had been looking forward to see the South Island ever since I arrived, and finally... Finally, I was there.
 I was picked up in Invercargill by Lincoln's father, Michael. He lived there in Invercargill and I was initially gonna be spending 2 nights there at his house. Since that first night was spent in Auckland's International Terminal, this was now reduced to a single night, forcing me to cancel my plans for Curio Bay and its "petrified forest".. (vandaar dus, Iris! I'M SORRY, okay?!) But despite my short stay, they were really kind to me while I was there (: The guy was a grandfather already, but he was about the same age as my dad.. A real interesting man, it was. I had some pretty intense discussions with the man that night after dinner, about all sorts of things. About marriage, kids, human history, human "breeds"... We didn't quite agree on a few things about these subjects and I'm telling you, the guy was TWICE as stubborn than I was! And that's saying something! Nonetheless, I enjoyed those discussions, I really did. Our opinions might've been completely different at some points, but I respect that man.

That next morning, I was dropped off at the Invercargill Visitor's center where I'd catch my bus down to Bluff, where the ferry would pick me up and take me right down to Stewart Island. This is an island just a few kilometers South off the coast of New Zealand's South Island. It's about the size of our province Zeeland, only difference being that it's inhabited by... Well, barely 400 people. It's got one little village and that's it! The rest of the island is just this vast, native, untouched forest. Now, just for the record, here in the Netherlands, almost every single bit of forest we have is planted by us. It's all been taken down at one point or another, until we finally got to a point where we finally realized its value. You don't know what you've got until you miss it.
 This makes Stewart Island some sort of treehugger-paradise. Real, raw nature... This is what I came to New Zealand for. I couldn't wait. Lincoln's dad had warned me about the ferry, he was almost certain that I'd throw up somewhere along the way but, thankfully, the contents of my stomache stayed right where it's supposed to be.
 I'd been hoping for some clear weather upon my arrival, to get that "magical" first impression of the island, y'know? Unfortunately it remained as grey as a Dutch winter day, but with those clouds making their way over the mountaintops, it might even have looked better than it would have on a sunny day. The island looked amazing and I couldn't wait to get on my way. All I had left to do was to get some food supplies for the next couple of days but, unexpextedly, this is where the more serious troubles started...

I knew the population on Stewart Island was small, but I never expected them NOT TO HAVE an ATM down there..? They didn't have a bank or anything..! But, no worries, I still have my credit card :) This thing had proven ESSENTIAL on my travels so far and had never let me down. Until now.
 See, until then, I had always just signed for every payment I made using my credit card. Didn't need a PIN-number or anything. However, down on Stewart Island, they didn't support this possibility either. You could pay electronically, but it just kept insisting on a PIN number that I didn't have! The people at the store let me call my bank about the issue and thank God they were available - it being past midnight back in the Netherlands. They told me that I SHOULD have a PIN number for that credit card and that they could request a new one but this would require me to identify myself at the bank. In the Netherlands. Fucked up... After that, the manager of the store advised me to try their main hotel, said that maybe they could help me. That's where people usually went to withdraw some cash. But this had the same result! The woman seemed understanding at let me use their phone to try and call my bank again. The guy that was helping me out this time was really helpful, he understood my situation very well and tried everything in his power to try and help me, he went to his teamleader, then to his boss, but none of them could help...

And that's when the panic started creeping in. Here I was, on an island, for 5 days, with no money. Well that was the worst part; I did háve the money, I just couldn't access it! I hate to admit it, but I cried in anger and desperation while talking on the phone... What was I supposed to do?! I had already booked and payed for the ferry trip back, but what was I going to live off for the next FIVE DAYS?! What the HELL was I gonna do?!?!
 I tried to pull myself together after that phonecall before bringing back the phone, but I think the hotel manager picked up on it right away. She was really kind and told me that she'd been in a similar situation once, over in Australia. She had a few suggestions, but after ruling out any other possibilities, she offered to lend me some money for those few days I was on the island. I could just transfer the money back to her account afterwards..! She had to offer this 3 times before I accepted, but you wouldn't believe the overwhelming sense of relief that followed.

So, after a long struggle with reality, I could finally make my escape from it. Away from our modern day society, from everything and everyone, just to throw yourself into the unknown. On your own! A few people responded quite surprised when I told them I was gonna be doing these walks all by myself, but I wouldnt've had it any other way.

And it was everything I hoped it could be.

Once again, I'd have to refer you to the photo's I made to give you but a fraction of an idea of what it was like, but it was fan-tastic. Waking up in the middle of a rainforest, with such a vast abundance of life around you. So much life, yet not a single human being. I had the whole thing to myself! It's a different sense of freedom, one that I hadn't ever felt before.
 It might've been a little wet, but that's just part of the fun. I was fully prepared for a bit of rain, but even when it was dry I couldn't resist running through those tempting looking puddles along the track. Even the mud, which you'd normally try to avoid whenever possible... After a while, you even start appreciating the sound of suction it makes when you pull your boots back out of it :P If you're reading this right now, just try and imagine that sound, we all know what it sounds like :P Good stuff... Good stuff.
 One of my most pleasant memories from this particular trip was on the second day. It had been softly raining most of the afternoon, and I really felt fantastic - both mentally and physically. Once you get that feeling in your legs and you've had those 25 kilograms on your back for a while, you don't even feel the weight anymore, it just becomes a part of your body. And with that warmed up feeling in your legs, you feel like you could walk non-stop for hours, days, even weeks. Jack Johnson is always perfect music to play in the rain, and there I was singing along with "Banana Pancakes" on the top of my lungs, 'cause there was noone around to hear me anyway!
 "Oh can't you see that it's just raaii-niing. Aaiin't no need to oouutsiide..."

Time flew by, and before I knew it, I was already on the ferry back to Bluff..! Exhausted but satisfied, I was on my way back to civilization. Heading back there, just to get away all over again! I would rest when I got back home. Upon arriving back in Bluff, I'd booked a bus taking me from there right up to Te Anau: the main gateway to Fiordland National Park. There, I had a few hours to take care of a few preperations, took a water taxi over Lake Te Anau, where I commenced the Kepler Track... A hike that still stands as one of the highlights of my whole trip through New Zealand.
 That watertaxi dropped me off on a small beach, almost INSTANTLY changing into a HUGE forest after the first couple of meters. I couldn't believe my eyes..! I've never seen a forest like this one before, it was magical. Almost everything was covered with green, be it from moss, leaves or algae. It looked magical! Seriously, you'd swear that any one of those trees could just get up at any given moment to run off and destroy Isengard :P
 Fiordland is known for its humidity, getting a few meters of rain each year. 2 out of 3 days is just constant rain... Yet during those 4 days that I was there, I felt a total of FOUR raindrops! In fact, I got sunburned again :D Whoopie. I had dropped off my tent and some other stuff in a locker somewhere, getting rid of any unnecessary weight. The Kepler Track crosses a few mountains, the highest one of which (Mt Luxmore) is a good 1,472 metres high. And trust me when I tell you that you don't want to be carrying those 25 kilo's up that high. Instead, I'd be staying in the three huts built along the track - also saving you the trouble of putting up and breaking down your tent every day ;) Bit more expensive, but worth every penny. And the best part that I later found out, was that every hut seemingly came with its own little extra's. The Luxmore Hut had some really impressive caves just 10 minutes off the track, which I explored with a fellow Dutchman (still wearing his last Lowlands wristband :D!!) and a few Germans. The second, the Iris Burn Hut had this fantastic waterfall nearby. And the last, the Moturau hut, was right next to Lake Manapouri, giving you the opportunity to go for a swim after a long day's walk! And you can really use one, knowing that none of the huts have showering facilities (duh). All the creeks and rivers I found so far (quite a few) were all freezing cold, even too cold for you feet, but the lake was about 20 degrees when I got there! I'd been making jokes about going for a swim in there, so imagine my surprise... Best swim I've had in a very. very. long time. Not with the horribly salty water I found/tasted on most beaches. OOHHH and the sunset that evening..!!!! My GOD! Remind me to put a link to that photo here, it must've been the most magical sunset I've ever seen in my life. I'm being serious here, just wait until you see that photo...

On the last day, when I found my way back to Te Anau, looked up the restaurant I'd picked out from my "travel bible" (I wanted my first dinner to be "special" :P) and ate so much so fast that my stomache hurt and couldn't even finish up my dessert. Never before has dessert been a problem for me, and it's completely against my principles to leave my plate unfinished, but this time I really couldn't do it...
 Once I'd recovered I headed straight to my hostel, one that I chose because my waiter told me that they had a spa... A spa, jacuzzi, hot tub, whatever you want to call it. The girl at the counter felt my pain and just handed me the keys to the spa for free. I dragged myself over there, absolutely exhausted, dove in there, and I'm telling you: I couldn't move. I couldn't move for two hours straight - the hot water just relaxed every single muscle in my body. Every single one, except for my heart maybe. Although I don't know, maybe that one too :P ULTIMATE relaxation! The only thing I had to worry about was keeping my head above water, which was quite a task at this point, trust me. 

My last full day there in Te Anau was spent at the amazing Doubtful Sound. A cruise that lasted almost the entire day. Together with the Milford Sound, these two make up what probably is the most popular destination for tourists in New Zealand. And I'm sure you'll see why, when you see the photo's... See for yourself!

As much as I enjoyed Te Anau so far, I'd seen all the places that I really wanted to see. And with less than 3 weeks to go, it was time to pick up the pace and hit the road again. On to Queenstown: Tourist Capital of New Zealand. This whole city somehow breathed internationalism, it had me wondering how many people around me were actually FROM NZ. I heard many great things about this city from people I'd met along the way, but... Me personally, I can't stand that whole commercialized tourism atmosphere. Of course you can't leave New Zealand without having bungyjumped and I'll admit that I really WAS quite eager to check this out, so I decided that I would just do the jump, get that over with, then get the hell back outta there.
 When I got back home, one of the first questions people usually asked me was "So how was the bungyjump?!". Some of them seemed a bit disappointed when told them that: That it wasn't quite as much of a rush than I hoped it would be..! I don't know. I thought you'd get that wind blowing in your face aaalllll the way down, but it really doesn't feel all that far. It's kinda like diving off the higher diving board, only the point of actually jumping is uhmm... A bit harder ;) You could choose from 3 different jump-sites; I just stuck with the classic Kawarau bridge, where "first bungyjump ever was made by AJ Hackett, founder of the company" bla bla bla. Commercial tourism crap. The reason I chose that one, was that this was the only one that offered you the "submerge" option, letting you touch the water, or even dive right into it.
 All in all, yeah it was cool, but I'm not sure if it's worth the NZD$160/€80 you pay for it. And then they even have the guts to charge you ANOTHER $45 for the damn photo's!! Me? I managed to get them for free. Hah. And I must admit, I AM quite proud of them (:

I'll spare you the story about my weird roommates in Queenstown... Yes, instead, I'll just move right on to the next day, where my journey began with Flyingkiwi! Man, did I enjoy this. Flyingkiwi is/was a tourbus-agency that I'd booked a few months in advance, because I didn't want to be doing the whole trip alone. Of course, you always meet plenty of people along the way, but. You hang with these people for maybe a few days and then you never see them again. And I'm really glad that I did book this trip because it was so much more than I'd initially expected it to be.
 Because you see, the thing about Flyingkiwi, was their whole laid-back-ness. It wasn't just a tour-bus, it was more like a backpacker-bus. A big mobile home. They carried bicycles, tents, a portable kitchen, a small library and best of all: a fruitbox! All the fruit you could eat, right there at your disposal. Apricots, peaches, oranges, apples, prunes, bananas, pears... Everything. Great stuff.

You might be wondering what I was complaining about earlyer: first I'm whining about not wanting to travel in groups, and here I am joining a whole group of other tourists! What the hell man?
 Truth be told, I was a bit hesitant about this at first, as well. But this really was a lot easier,  cheaper and most of all, more social. I really wanted to give this a chance and I must say that it worked out perfectly. I'd be spending a full week with this group, going from Queenstown way through the rugged West Coast, up to Picton: the most Northern part of the South Island.
 And I've gotta tell ya, it really WAS a fantastic journey! Along the way, we stopped at all the places that I really wanted to see, like the Glaciers, the Pancake Rocks, Abal Tasman National Park, and some of the most beautiful beaches I've ever seen. And quite a few spots that I never would've found by myself but were amazing anyway. Not just the "typical" tourist spots. A whole range of places where we set up camp were relatively small towns which most of us had never even heard of. Which most KIWI's had never even heard of! Our guide & driver really knew what they were doing. Genuine South Islanders, proud of their country and more than happy to show it around. But they didn't make everything sound TOO interesting as you would expect from most tours. Nothing too formal, that's what I liked about them. Buncha douchebags, that's what they were :P Nga & Brad... We had some great times with those two.

It's funny though, I only spent about a week with those people. And just like with our group back in Auckland, you grow so close with the people you travel with. Most of them already knew eachother since they were doing the tour through the whole country for a full month. I was just hitching along with them, but I felt sorry to leave them again, even after a mere week. Every night, after along day of exploring this wonderful country together, we set up camp somewhere, every day had a different cooking group which would take care of dinner and cleanup, and usually spend the rest of the night talking around a campfire or gas-light. It creates a bond, y'know? Everyone in the group had their own typical characteristics, culture and background, all those differences united in harmony. It took me a while to get all the names down, but I got along with most of them perfectly fine. Especially two of them; Rachel & Sarah. Definitely my two favorite people on the tour. The three of us explored most of the tour together. They had the idea to come down here to the Netherlands some time for either Pinkpop or Lowlands, that would be fantastic..!! The same with Ross & Jim from Big Day Out by the way, I don't think I've seen the last from them just yet, either. It's fantastic, all those new international contacts :)

When my part of the tour ended in Picton, I said my goodbyes to everyone from Flyingkiwi as they got on the boat to Wellington. I wouldn't be heading back up there until a few days later. I had some other plans first: one last hike here on the South Island before I head back up to the North Island for my two final concerts. The end of my trip was approaching fast... I couldn't grasp the idea at first but, since this was my LAST WEEK already, you start realizing that these will be your last few moments in this country. What was home going to be like after this? How could home ever live up to this country's beauty? How would my friends back home be doing? And my family..? ...Would my grandfather be watching over me right now?
 I decided just to stay focused on this last week that I had left here in this country, and that's exactly what I did. Time for the Queen Charlotte Track this time!

After having traveled in a group like that for a while, it was a bit weird to be heading back out on my own again. Weird, but nice nonetheless. But before I went back into the New Zealand wilderness again, it would be a good idea to get some supplies first. For which one would require money! The financial issues had been partially resolved by now, since I'd been able to get my money from my normal Dutch account so far, but I was already past my monthly budget. With a few Euro's remaining on my own account, my credit card was all I could fall back on. BUT! Won't you believe it, after the issues we had in Stewart Island, the damn thing had been BLOCKED because I tried a wrong PIN-code 3 times. Here we go again...
 Thanksfully, Dee still owed me some grocery-money so, after a few calls, money was on the way. 100 NZ dollars (50 Euro's) should be enough for a week, right? Just a shame that I wouldn't actually RECEIVE the money until the next morning... Where should I stay tonight..?

I went by a few holiday parks if they wouldn't mind me staying there and paying afterwards but once I found out their rates, I just luaghed in their face and walked back out again. 16 dollars for a bloody patch of land for one night... Hah. No thanks.
 One the the best things about New Zealand, is that there's nature everywhere. Even in bigger cities. I decided I'd just look up a bikker forest somewhere and set up my tent there, whether it was allowed or not. I didn't find out about the fine you'd have to pay if they caught you doing this until a few months later, but what're the odds of that anyway. I went to the nearest forest I could find but, with this forest on a hill, it turned out to be pretty hard to find an EVEN patch of land without trees on it. With the sun already setting, I really had to make haste if I still wanted to see anything to put up my tent. Eventually I found a decent spot somewhere just off the main path, hidden within the trees, but not really even. It had to do.
 Spending the night there on that spot was kinda weird, waking up 3 times that night because I slided down halfway through my tent again, but knowing that it was free made it all worthwhile ;) I felt fantastic that next morning. Who needs hostels or holiday parks? This was a completely different kind of traveling, and it felt fantastic. Like a nomad. It changes your whole outlook on the value of money, both in a good- and bad way. I won't get into it too far right now, but you don't realize the meaning of its value until you've lived like this once. It also gives a certain kind of respect for homeless people. I'd spoken with a few of them back in Auckland, and I don't know HOW they do it...
 Seriously, next time that a homeless guy walks up to you and you've got some free time, try talking to the guy for a bit. Some of them have some fascinating stories about how they ended up at this point of their lives.

That morning I packed up my tent not long after waking up, before people went on their morning jogging-sessions. Those Kiwi's are real earlybirds ;) Besides, you can forget sleeping in on a 10 degree angle :P Since my dinner from yesterday consisted of 2 apples and an orange that I took with me from the bus, I was really hungry for some breakfast. So the first thing I did was to see if my money had arrived yet and YESSS!! We were safe! Alriight. Let's get this show on the road.
 I bought all the essentials I needed for my trip, including this delicious looking Bacon&Cheese-loaf that was on special that morning. I was gonna save that for the trip, yes I was. After enjoying an amazing breakfast on the beach, I went to look for a way to get to Ship Cove. The starting point to the Queen Charlotte Track, only reachable by boat. Cheapest way to get there cost me $45, which was A LOT more than I had anticipated! I mean geez, if you're supposed to live off $100 that week, I really had to watch my expenses with utmost care. Bt this was gonna be my last trek through the South Island! My last trek through NEW ZEALAND! No way was I gonna cancel this. "Screw it", I thought. "Let's do this".

And I'm so glad that I did. It was quite a challenge, but all the more rewarding. The mail boat took me all the way through Queen Charlotte Sound, dropping off mail orders along the way. A few people actually lived on these desolated islands. I was the only guy on the boat that got off there at Ship Cove, some people on the boat seemed a bit surprised, asking me if I was sure about doing this :P "Yes I am, sir", I responded. "Yes I am. Trust me, you've nothing to worry about". And off we went. Back on the tracks!
 The walk was fantastic, offering just enough variation from the other walks I'd done so far. Unfortunately, the start didn't quite go as I'd hoped... I had barely been walking for an hour when I came across this sideroad leading to a waterfall up ahead. So I dropped my bag and went to check it out, just to discover that it barely had any water all falling down at all, because of the drought they'd been having. Oh well. So I run back down to resume the track, when I found this little bastard Weka going through all my stuff! What the hell?! My nectarines! No!
 I ran to my bag, scared off the annoysome bird to find that it'd pecked through almost every one of my nectarines..! Son of a bitch! I washed them all and ate them on the spot, but I needed those things for the rest of the track... Damnit. "And hey, where's that Bacon&Cheese-loaf anyw-... O God", I thought to myself. "He didn't-...". Oohh yes he diiiid! That bastard!! It took my whole bacon&cheese loaf, I'd been SAVING that thing!!! It VANISHED without a single trace. Not a single crumb was to be found anywhere, I was... Ik was met stomheid geslagen. Niet te geloven.

Now with a slight lack of food, I had to pick up the pace and do the whole track in 3 DAYS instead of 4, which meant that I had to walk 20 to 30 kilometers per day.. This is why this track was such a challenge for me, but I made it eventually! It a tough journey, but I made it. And how. The only way to tell you why, would be the photo's.. :)
 At the end of the track, I still had to find a way to get back to Picton, which still was a good 20 kilometers. After having walked this far I wouldn't have minded to walk that little bit further, but there's no fun walking by the wayside. So I just kept walking, only this time with my thumb in the air. Within an hour I was in a campervan heading back toward Picton, eastwardbound.
 
Last night in Picton. As a level 2 Nomad, I found a better spot to set up my tent this time. A little beach with its own bathroom, with a fantastic view over Picton. I still wasn't allowed to set up my tent here, but. The hell with it. It was too late to take any pictures so I'm afraid that I couldn't show you the view that night, but I sat there for hours. Watching the ferry arrive and leave again, carrying hundreds of lights throught the Queen Charlotte Sounds, was a surreal sight. An amazing last night on the South Island. I sat there thinking about everything this last month had done for me, all the people I'd met, the things I'd seen, the festivals and concerts, the Weka that stole my bread... I smiled and realized: "We're almost there...", as I fell asleep to the sound of the waves crushing into the beach.

The horn of the 9 o'clock ferry woke me up that next morning, as a reminder for my last few hours here on the South Island. When I unzipped the front of my tent, the tears welled up in my eyes as I saw that ferry leave Picton under the brightest rainbow I'd ever seen. The photo hardly shows its real beauty, but it's the best I can give you. I felt like the luckyest guy on earth to be sitting there, on the other side of the world. I was probably the only person in the world that could see that rainbow, as the people in the city itself couldn't see it (due to the angle in which the light is broken). It was like the South Island was saying goodbye to me. Goodbye... <:)
 Thinking of the plane I missed back in Auckland, I headed straight for the Ferry terminal, checking in 3 hours in advance. Normally I hate waiting, but I couldn't afford to miss it this time. Explosions in the Sky would be playing in Wellington that night, and I don't know WHAT I would've done if I missed it. Heads would've rolled, mark my words!

I clomb aboard the ferry with the weirdest feeling in my stomache... I couldn't figure out what was causing it until I got up to the deck. These memories really took me by surprise, as they took me back to the ferry from Terschelling 8 months ago...
 I'd managed to fend off these memories and their corresponding feelings relatively well these last couple of months, but suddenly everything was right back in my face. Trying to forget about Elise had worked out fairly well for me so far but, here on this boat, I could almost feel her sleeping head on my left shoulder as I stared out into the sea trying to figure out what to do. I was right back there. I remembered how happy I was that summer. All those things we'd done together. That certain look in her eyes she got sometimes that I liked so much. What her body felt like... "I wonder how she's doing", I thought.
 All those thoughts, memories and feelings crashed and burned when I remembered why I told myself to stop thinking about it. When I felt that anger boil back up again, I grabbed my iPod and looked up Weezer's "Perfect Situation" again, heard the ferry's horn go off as it set out into Cook Strait. Back to Wellington.

The closer we got to Wellington, the more excited I got. That night, I'd FINALLY get to see Explosions in the Sky again! Finally. Since I spent most of this last month sleeping in my tent, I rarely got the opportunity to charge my iPod. This, leading to a MAJOR lack of music! I'd gotten so hungry for music lately, a good concert was just what I needed.
 However, I didn't have a place to stay that night either. I couldn't care about it that at the time, but finding a spot in a city the size of Wellington would prove to be quite a challenge. The first thing I'd try was to spend the night at the backpackers' where I had always stayed sofar. The owner was sure to recognize me... They had this little campground in the back, I'm sure they'd let me set up my tent there just for one night?
 But when I got there, the woner wasn't around, having put some bimbo in charge who couldn't allow it :S "He'll be back in the morning", she said. Yeah, that'll help ¬_¬ So I walked back out, went around the building over to that little campground and just put up my tent. If the owner wasn't around anyway, then who's gonna mind, right? With my tent up, I went into the back of the hostel, took my first shower in TWO WEEKS and laughed on my way back out. "Thanks a lot," I thought, "I'm off to my concert!". 

The gig just blew my mind. It litterly blew every worry in my mind, but still leaving my eardrums intact, thankfully :P I'd played their music a LOT on those Great Walks this last month, and I visualized myself traversing those mountains to the music. Thought of my whole trip to New Zealand, the whole experience, everything flashed by as I cried of happiness. It was perfect...
 In a small venue such as that one (San Francisco Bath House - about 400 people, I think?), the band even got in with the crowd after the gig. I'd been talking to this girl for about an hour after the gig, and just as we were on our way out I snuck up on Munaf & Michael from the back, put my hand on Munaf's shoulder and said "Annnnd I'll see you guys in three months in Amsterdam!!", to which he said "How tall are you?".
 Hahahaha, no, just kidding. I had a great little talk with those two and even got to congratulate Eluvium on his fantastic performance. Very modest bunch of guys, and I think/hope they'll remember me next month in Amsterdam AND Groningen ;) We'll see about that.
 When I got back to the campground that night, slightly relieved that my tent was still there, I went to brush my teeth to go straight to bed. But with no phone and an iPod with a dead battery, I had no way of telling the time. Now, OR next morning. And I needed to catch the 9 o'clock bus that next morning or I'd have a real problem... So I asked some guy that was still messing about in his car what time it was, not knowing that I'd be spending the next 2 hours in there with him and his girlfriend XD I already recognized that look in his eyes and my suspicion was confirmed when they passed down a joint to me. Yup. Hippies. Apparantly they were at the gig as well that night and especially the guy seemed to've enjoyed it as much as I had. What a night... What a night. I kept on laughing about their funny Irish accents throughout the whole night, it was fantastic :P I can still hear them fighting about the weirdest things. They offered me to come along with them after hearing about my "adventures" but, "Thanks man, but I'm on my last week here already...".

I slept through most of the ride to Hawera that next morning. The driver even recognized me when I got on the bus :P Nice guy. The trip over there takes about 5 hours, but some sleep always helps to speed things up a little bit; I was there before I knew it. My last day in Hawera...
 They picked me up from the bus, which was 45 minutes late, but I really enjoyed seeing everyone again. I can honestly say that I'd missed them, Jacob most of all. I wasn't sure if he'd even recognize me anymore but... Well, I guess I should've known better ;) Incredible how much he'd grown in that single month. Dee had organized a little farewell dinner for me with the whole family, Dee's parents and Lincoln's parents. They were all too eager to find out about my travels 'nd spent most of the evening catching up on everything. Most of my NIGHT however, was spent catching up on WORK. This had been piling up since I left and I must say that I quite enjoyed the thought that I was somewhat "needed" here in Hawera ;) Only this time, I was payed for my work! $25 dollars an hour... Not too shabby, ey? And I could use the money, too.
 That last morning there, we said our goodbyes, but I had and still have the feeling that I'll be seeing them again. I'm so curious to see what those kids will grow up to be like. I promised Dee they could stay with me whenever they were to come over to the Netherlands when they're my age. That should be interesting.
 They also gave me a little farewell-present..! Turned out to be a Jade necklace! The one I'm wearing right now. I was só happy with this thng. I'd already wanted one of those, but you're not "allowed" to buy them for yourself. You're only supposed to receive them as a gift. That Ross I'd met told me that he'd even called up his mom, asking her to transfar some money to him, as a gift, with which he could then buy one of them in form of a gift from his mother :P I had already given up hope on getting one for myself, but. Well, surprise :D

I felt sorry to leave them but, as I said before, I wouldn't be the last time. Dee drove me over to the Airport with the kids, where I'd get on the plane back to Auckland in order to be on time for my concert that night. Interpol! My farewell concert... And the first and last concert I'd ever attend on flip-flops! What on earth was I thinking? :P
 Another great night, although the atmosphere in the crowd was not as intense as it was with EitS 2 days ago. Still, it was an appropriate farewell to... To Auckland, to New Zealand and... And to valentine's day? :P No. No, let's just stick to those first two.

My last couple of days in Auckland were spent catching up with my uncle and aunt, who were really helpful with everything. When my time was up, they brought me to the airport once again, on time, saw me off to the gates, and that was that... Almost six months had past since I arrived there on that airport, felt like two weeks. I just couldn't believe it was time to go. That day, I made a promise to myself . A promise that I'd return here one day. It's been a fantastic demonstration of what life has to offer, and there's LOTS MORE where that came from! Where to next? Time will tell... But I'm itching to head back out there.

Some people turn to God to show their gratitude, some people would turn to whoever might've made it possible. Me, I thank *life. I thank life for existing.

And I turn to you, to thank you for reading this long, long update :P Give yourself a hand. Thanks for reading caring. Really :)

Good night everyone! Thanks for checking in on me.
       ~Cheers

Good day everyone!
55 days to go and exactly a month after my last update, I thought it'd be about time to write a new one. But the timing isn't the only reason that I'm writing this right now; I've actually got a few announcements to make! And, unlike these last two updates, it's good news! In fact, that's quite a bit of an understatement - it's fuckin'GREAT, that's what it is!!

Right, so what's the big deal?
Well, with the end of the year coming so close, so is the end of my internship... January 11th. And with my plane not leaving until the 16th of February, it means that my "month of freedom" is almost here as well! I'd actually already expected time to go this fast, so I started planning a bit early. Which is quite unlike me ;) (nog 'ns wat anders dan "Wuahhh, komt wel goed") I think it's also got something to do with the holidays drawing close... I must admit that I have been getting a little homesick from time to time, and especially the idea of being alone on Christmas was  not a very pleasant thought. I'm sure you can imagine. Fortunately, I won't be! It seems that my host-family here was even expecting me to be there! An offer I couldn't refuse. I still can't believe their generosity...

But I've found that the perfect cure against this home-sick-ness, is planning! That's right; planning. It's the best reminder you can get, to remind you just what the hell you're doing down here on the other side of the world. Every time that I felt that feeling pop up (quite often on a Sunday-morning, I've noticed...), I just grabbed my "travel-bible" the Lonely Planet to look around and discover New Zealand, right from my kingsize bed. Does miracles, I tell you.
 And there's a lot involved with that planning! More than you'd think. With such a vast country at your fingertips, the whole thing soon becomes a huge maze of... Of total awesomeness :P It's just so hard to decide on what you want to do, what you can do and what you've got time for. I've got about a full month for the whole South Island... A South Island may not sound like much, but please bear in mind that it's still almost 4 times the size of the Netherlands. (and only just over 1 million inhabitants - most people live here up North... So much for balance)

Right, so... What's the big deal?!
Hang on, man, I'm getting to it! Jesus.
The thing is, it didn't just stick to planning! After I'd made up my mind about everywhere that I wanted to go, I could move on to defining a route through the country, and from there on you set dates to the places... It's been quite a consuming task, but eventually figured out the perfect route. But here comes the best part:

Ladies and gentlemen - with pride I would like to announce that, as of yesterday, my FULL TRIP is completely booked and payed for!! Everything is taken care of, and all I have to do now is WAIT. Which isn't easy, trust me on that one ;) But it's a great feeling, it really is. Just knowing what I'm in for, it brings a certain kind of confidence. As far as transport is concerned, I'm fully covered. Way up until Amsterdam.
 It's gonna be quite an expensive month for me, but I can already tell you that it's gonna be the most amazing month of my life. Up until now, that is. I still hope to exceed it even further in the future, of course ;) I know it sounds a bit rash, but just let me explain how I came to this conclusion. Let me explain my plans.

Have a good look at my route! I've spent a lot of time making that, explaining all the details and adding everything. It's a perfect way of showing you folks back home where I'll be going. It's also helped me get a perfect overview of everything. I'll explain it step by step... Please note that the placemarks on the left are not in the right order; they go by numbers. I'll explain in the right order.

• It all starts right here in Hawera. It's the bright green pushpin.

1. Wellington (Kings of Leon)
2. Auckland (The National and Big Day Out)
   (then way down to the South Island...)
3. Invercargill
4. The Catlins / Curio Bay
5. Invercargill
6. Stewart Island
7. Te Anau
8. Kepler Track
9. Te Anau
10. Queenstown (Bungyjump!)
11. Fox Glacier
12. Punakaiki (Pancake Rocks)
13. Abel Tasman National Park (Skydive!)
14. Picton
15. Queen Charlotte Track
16. Picton
    (annnd back up to the North Island...)
17. Wellington (Explosions in the Sky)
18. Hawera (farewell-dinner with everyone)
19. Auckland (Interpol)

Instead of writing everything down here, you can just view a detailed description of every stop, just by clicking on the corresponding placemark! I've even added pictures and everything, I don't know a better way to share it with you guys - YET. Just wait 'til you see the photo's when I get back! Most of you seem to've quite enjoyed the photos that I made so far; you ain't seen nothin'yet! The best is yet to come ;)

But that's not all! Nooo, there's even more! This is all still a few weeks away, but... Well, you might already have noticed that smaller turquoise route - that's my Christmas holiday! That trip will start RIGHT after Christmas: this Wednesday (26th) I'll be heading off to Taupo for a day of Parasailing (:D) on the lake, and finish off the day with The Black Seeds - AGAIN! After that it's on to Gisborne, where the party REALLY gets started! I mentioned Rhythm & Vines in my last update - that's on New Year's Eve, but the campsite party starts on the 27th already... A full week of camping with 9000 other R&V-attendees - my kind of people... ;)
 Gisborne actually had an earthquake just 2 days ago, by the way! Quite a big one too: a 6.8 on Richter, causing a few buildings to collapse but only a few people got hurt. It's been on the news throughout the world, but I don't think the Netherlands payed much attention to it. A few people from America and Canada emailed me afterwards to see if I was okay, very thoughtful.. :)
 The Rhythm&Vines site states the following: "GISBORNE ROCKED WITH THE 6.8 EARTHQUAKE BUT RHYTHM & VINES WILL ROCK EVEN MORE...". Yeheaahh.

For planning purposes, I've put everything down in my calendar as well. Every concert, every activity, every trip, every bus, flight & ferry is in there. (Nee Ferry, jou bedoel ik niet) You can click any event for details. So now everyone back home can see exactly WHERE I'll be, and WHEN! It's perfect! Keep in mind that all times mentioned are in NZ's timezone ;)

If you have a good look at that calendar, you might notice a little extra... The very last part is already part of my planning for back home! Now, I know some of you will call me insane for this but... I'm gonna have a homecoming-concert! ...A FEW HOURS AFTER MY ARRIVAL!! XD
 That's right! As you can see in that calendar of mine, I'll be arriving on Schiphol at 17:55. Let's say check-out would last about an hour, 10 minutes trainride to Amsterdam... En dan DIRECT DOOR NAAR DE MELKWEG!! Hahaaaa, I'm loving this... the Mad Caddies just happen to be playing in Amsterdam on the very evening after my arrival. It's gonna be a close call and I might even miss the start of the gig, but I don't care. There's no better way to celebrate my homecoming ;) I just have to figure out what I'm gonna do with my luggage, but I'm sure we'll figure something out.

So yeah, everyone who's planning to come pick me up is invited to this concert! :D It would mean SO MUCH to me to have some more friends there... One of my favorite gig-friends, Mat, is going either way and was even so kind to buy my ticket for me, but... Please join me! Even if you barely know the band, even if you don't go to concerts as often as I do, it's VERY accessible music and we'd just make it a night to remember :)

Whoever can't make it on that particular night, I would EXPECT you to be on my homecoming party! I've explained this before, I really want EVERYONE here! Y'hear me? EVERYONE! Both local and long-distance friends. My guys, the other 2 local hippie groups (inclusief Elise & Sebas..), my concert-friends, school friends, Marieke, Randolf, Emiel, Tienkamp, Daniëlle, Iteke, Zuriël... Renske&Daniël, ook jullie zijn nog uitgenodigd :) Bring a friend, het kan er allemaal wel bij! THIS IS GONNA BE BIG, PEOPLE! :D Nieuw Zeeland moet helaas vroeg of laat wel tot een eind komen, maar dat hoeft niet direct ook een eind aan de pret te betekenen ;)
 Now, we already had a slight lack of chairs/space at my farewell-party, but I'm considering to do it in Scherpenzeel this time. People could even spend the night that way, especially people from longer distances. We'd just have to figure somethin'out for transport, OR just stuff it into my place anyway. We'll figure something out!

So mark it down! Friday, the 22nd of February. Keep that date free and do what ever you have to to make it there. I really hope to see you all then :)

That's it for now. I still had some other things I wanted to mention, but I'll save those for later. And don't forget; I'll be off the radar from December 26th until the 3rd of January. I'm still phone-less, so I'm afraid that I really wouldn't be able to call or be called :( I'm getting a new phone soon, but I don't think I'll have it by New Year's Eve... Just think of me around noon on the 31st - I'll already have entered 2008 ;)

I hope you all have a great Christmas and an even better 2008... 'm sorry I won't be able to celebrate it with any of you this time, but I'll be there for 2009. I promise :)

Tot eind Februari iedereen!

From New Zealand

Good night!

From New Zealand

Another summer past, another autumn near. At least for you folks back home, for I won't be witnessing it this year ;) Spring has just set in here in Hawera and I'm enjoying every minute of it. It's raining right now though, giving me the perfect opportunity to sit down and finally get my space updated about my trip so far! It's taken way too long, I know... This has already been my third week here in New Zealand and there's a lot to write about. As always. I know I kept you waiting for this update for way too long, but I'm sure that you'll understand that I've had my hands full around here...
I haven't written anyone (back) yet since I've been here either. (except for Elise of course ;))  This is because I wanted to have this space update finished before I started writing people. Hope you understand :) I HAVE been reading everything I received and I can't tell you how much it pleases me to read them. After I finished this update right here, I'll be right back up emailing/messaging again - so please don't hesitate to leave a message here, or an email or anything at all! ;D It's great to read what's going on up there, especially because of the distance... You're dearly missed :)
I do have some bad news however: my phone broke down just this week so I can't read or respond to any text messages or answer phone calls anymore :( It's weird, because I feel so much further away from home ever since it broke down.. Still working on a replacement for it but I'll keep you updated on that.
Right! That having said, let's just move right on to the actual matter at hand here, shall we? ;) The beginning is always a good place to start.

September 1st...!! The day I'd been looking forward to for so long, had finally arrived. Do you know that feeling when you've been looking forward to something for so long, but when it's finally there, it's... I don't know, it just felt weird. I still couldn't realize that this would be my last day at home for the next few months. Even had some trouble convincing myself that I was doing the right thing, leaving everything and everyone behind like this... My farewell-party from the night before had been a huge success (thanks again for coming you guys.. I don't think I'll ever forget that night), but I still hadn't packed anything the next morning! XD Typical, I know... So I got up the next morning at 7 and prepared everything, with barely enough time to say goodbye to everyone at home.
And this was tough, it really was... It might even have been the last time that I'll ever see my grandfather. Can you imagine what that was like...?! I couldn't. I honestly didn't know how to feel when I was standing there at his bed... Would he still be here when I get back? Will I ever see him again? Would I ever...
I hardly even got a chance to think about all of this, because it was a matter of minutes before he told me to head on to the train station or I'd miss my train. So typical of him to always be worrying about that... Turned out he was right though - I DID miss my train that afternoon ;) But I don't regret taking a little more time for that.

Monique was so sweet as to join me all the way to Schiphol (nogmaals bedankt hiervoor Mniq, ben echt blij dat je mee bent gekomen), so after waiting an additional hour on the train station with her, we were finally on our way... I had a last good look at the place that I call home and I felt a little home sick already. Anxious, nonetheless! The thought of not-seeing Elise anymore did bother me quite a bit though, but we both had and still have a good feeling about this, which is very comforting :)

The sight of Schiphol reminded me of January 1st right away: my weekend with Rene, Hannes and Beata. "...Who?" You know, the Finnish/Polish couple! New year's eve? Some fond memories there.. Although I'd been there several times before, I still had some trouble figuring out where to go. So went to inspect the signs and tables everywhere, and as we were doing so, some weird lady suddenly walks up to me saying "Die kant op meneeer". I turn around and it's my sister Noor smiling back at me! XD GREAT surprise!! And y'know, it's kinda funny, 'cuz as we were looking around where to go, just the three of us.. I loved seeing how those two seemed to get along, I got a certain sense of pride... Proud of my sister towards Monique, and the other way around. It was then that I realized that I was really gonna miss those two...
Noor has always been quite an advanced traveler. In fact, she's on her way to Africa as we speak! With this trip, she's got every single continent covered! Not counting Antarctica -_- This also meant that she knew her way around Schiphol, so I couldn't have wished for a better guide ;)

Checking in didn't go as smoothly as I'd hoped either..! There was this huge line, and as I was trying to figure out the computers there, I was looking around and BAM! Renske, her boyfriend and Emiel standing behind me! Doesn't anyone call anymore?! XD Hadn't seen Emiel in a pretty long time, but Renske & Daniel... It was nice 't they came to say goodbye, but - some of you might know that it hasn't been all "topsy-turvey" between us lately. There've also been some issues between her and Monique, so this was... I don't know, a bit awkward.
After a little chat we went on with the check-in and it turned out that I had way too much luggage on me: almost 9 kilograms over the maximum 20kg :x but after some switching some stuff around, we managed to work it all out.
After the check-in we spent our last 90 minutes together, eventually said our goodbyes and I'd be on my own from here on...!!!

This is where my journey began...!! What it all came down to. The very second everyone had gone, first thing I did was grab my iPod, scroll down to Dearly Departed, to play the first track of what I like to call the Soundtrack of my Journey: Clear For Takeoff. As the drums started playing, everything that'd been bothering me throughout this whole day just on-the-spot: the check-in-issue, the awkwardness with Renske, the doubts... I took a deep breath, smiled, and walked toward the boarding area.
New Zealand, here I come!!

Lots of people have asked me whether I've flown before or not during the months before my departure. Yes I have, but I hardly remember anything about it..! I think I was 8 back then, so I consider this my real first time ;) And what an experience it has been!! They seated me next to the emergency exit without any trouble, on both flights.. I never even had to ask for anything, they asked me! Being this tall is a blessing, I tell you ;)
I'd already been looking forward to takeoff for the last FEW WEEKS and it was everything I'd hoped for!! I was sitting there like a little kid in a rollercoaster XD Except I didn't scream like one, or tossed my hands in the air, but you get my point.
Here's something I don't understand though: How a 50-ton, massive, iron machine can defy gravity the way that it does, that's a bloody miracle, right?! And yet everyone is sitting there looking like -_-... How people can act so casual around something like that is... It's beyond me. Of course I don't want them to throw their hands in the air and start screaming like little kids, but a little enthusiasm never hurt anyone.
And here's another thing: the food...! As the stewards same out with their carts, I leaned over to my neighbor to ask: "How're we supposed to pay for our food? What currency?". So the guy looks at me and says "You don't!". Apparently they just keep handing out food and whatever! This flight was getting better and better! :D (I know, I know! The price is included with your plane-ticket.. I just prefer my version, shut up)
Oh, and before I forget... Spiderman 3? Don't bother.

Arriving in Shanghai was almost exactly as I'd expected: shabby looking airport, the weird language, and they were even growing rice right there next to the runway! Yup: we're in China. I had a blast though: I walked on to the customs department, hand over my passport and - I shit you not - the first thing this guy asks me is "Do you play basketball?". I liked China already.
And it got even better! After checking out with the rest of the passengers, you walk up to the pick-up-point where everyone has their friends or relatives waiting for them, and they're all staring at me like they'd never seen someone so AWESOME!! ...Either that or it was my tallness of course... I'm not sure. I think they could hear my footsteps resonate throughout the whole building. I walked out of their with this huge grin on my face, trying not to laugh XD It was like a live version of Madurodam.
...Okay, so I like to exaggerate. Sue me.
I had 3 hours to kill here in Shanghai, but I didn't really get to enjoy those.. Instead, me and the rest of the passengers traveling on to Auckland went through quite a hassle to get our LUGGAGE back! We were told that they sent it straight to Auckland, but as we were trying to explain that to them, they just laughed at us (I thought Chinese people were always so polite?) and told as that "Nooo, you need go back and peak dem oop". After being sent back and forth all over the airport we eventually got our stuff back and got in the plane way on time. Was a fun adventure though, of COURSE this trip couldn't happen without something like this going wrong.. It's typical. Met a few nice people because of it though, so it's all good!

The flight to Auckland was even better than the previous one: every chair came equipped with it's own computer, monitor embedded in the chairs and came with these little remote controls... I actually thought they'd placed my in business class or something! I could watch movies on this thing, LOTR to Mr. Bean.. Music; Kings of Leon to Coldplay to Pink Floyd... Even games! I watched "Surf's Up!", even laughed out loud a couple of times while everyone was sleeping :P Great, great movie. And you could even monitor our current position on the globe in 3D-view, all the stats (temperature, speed, height, distances, etc)...
I don't know why people hate flying so much!! Up above the clouds, movies, music, games, free food, great chairs... I'm already looking forward on my flight back home! ;P

(last paragraph, I promise! :P) (I told you I had a lot to write about)

Setting foot on New Zealand felt surreal... I couldn't believe I was actually going when I left home, but now I was being forced to believe it. before heading off to the customs section and picking up my bags, I just sat down for a while and let it all sink in for a while.. Can you visualize 16000 kilometers?
After working my way through all the baggage-checks I found my uncle Jan waiting for me in the Terminal. I'd be spending my first week here with them in Auckland and I'd never even seen them before and it was way overdue! The resemblance between him and my dad is almost creepy. Their physical appearance differs quite a bit, but their way of speech.. Their voice, their accent is identical. And it's funny, 'cuze he switches back and forth from Dutch to English even more than I do! His wife Joanne seemed very nice as well, they really made me feel right at home; it's great to have family living way out here.
During that week, I've seen both the worst and the best of Auckland, at least when it comes to the weather ;) It really is an amazing city: built in an ancient valley of volcanoes, it counts almost 50 of inactive volcanoes! If you have a good look at the city in Google Maps, you can even see them scattered throughout the city: they're the grassy hills with the hollow tip. try and count'em ;) I went up Mount Eden: amazing view up there.
What I like most about Auckland, is how a city covering over a 100 kilometers (!) can be so in touch with nature. They have this law that prohibits buildings having more than 2 stories outside the city center, so it just looks like a town when you're walking through it.. And there's parks, reserves and beaches scattered all over the place! Even right there in the city center...
We also went to see some of the area's highlights: the Waitakere Ranges, Muriwai- and Piha Beach. One looking even better than the other... But I'll let you be the judge of that!
I got some AMAZING shots of the entire trip so far. I managed to get my hands on a new camera, just a few days before I left, and the results are amazing! I'm sure you'll agree: have a look for yourself!!

Right now I'm here in Hawera, with the family I told you about earlier. It really took some getting used to, but I'm actually starting to feel at home here :) They're really making me a part of the family and I'm... just flattered by their hospitality. It's just been pretty tough not being able to see Elise for so long, but we've been staying in touch on a daily basis and I really do have a good feeling about the whole thing :) I'll introduce you to the family and the region in my next update, this one's long enough as it is! Just check out the photo's, as they say more than I possibly could.

Hope you enjoyed reading all that; I should head off to bed! It's 3am right now and I DO have to work tomorrow ;) I hope to hear from you guys soon, and that everyone back in Wolvega had a great time at the Linde Festival.. It's a shame I had to miss out this year, but I'll catch up next year! Be sure to tell me how it's been.

~Cheers!

From New Zealand

Welcome back, friends. Welcome to another space-update. I thought it'd be nice to post this one on the very first days of summer. And let me warn you about this one: it'll probably end up even longer than you had already gotten used to. It's been over 3 months already (!) since my last update, and the reason that I havn't written anything in all this time, is because so much has happened in these few months.. So much has changed, and so many big things to write about. I don't know where even to begin.

You know what, let's start off with biggest and best news of all. Might be old news to some of you but... You're sure to remember those plans I had for New Zealand? Well, I'm proud to inform you that almost everything is taken care of! I got accepted at an interested company located in Hawera, where I'll be able to work in return for free board and lodging. I just booked and payed for my flight last week and I'll be leaving the very 1st of september!
Great news, isn't it?! Even if you don't like me at all, I'll be out of your hair for 6 months :P Honestly, I'm thrilled. The whole thing just seems aboslutely perfect for me. Hawera is just a small town, almost as big as Wolvega. As you might know, I've never been much of a city-person, so it suits me perfectly.
I'd be staying with Dee McCrea and her family (don't they seem nice?). She founded the company 10 year ago, where they've had 2 French interns before. I'd get my own caravan (built in Holland!) complete with shower, toilet, heating, cooking facilities, double bed & TV.. Everything I could hope for! This way we'd both still have our privacy. To be honest with you, I still can't believe how lucky I am. The whole thing just sounds way too good to be true! Nontheless, whole thing just keeps getting closer and closer, with little more than 2 months remaining. That's right: 2 moths! 70 days... God, that's creepy.
Of course I'll be keeping this thing updated when I'm there, don't worry ;) I might be on the other side of this planet, but you'll never be completely rid of me. Whether this is a good or bad thing, is up to you. I'm sure that it'll turn out to be quite an experience, to say the least. An experience that I would love to see eternalized, by writing it all down here on my little spot on the web.

As this "little trip of mine" approaches, I'm getting more and more mixed feelings about the whole thing. Of course I'm psyched about it, and can't wait to finally live out this dream I've had for so long now, but... As time goes by, I seem to be looking at all those little things that I've been taking for granted all my life with a new set of eyes. "You don't know what you've got untill you're (about) to miss it". I've never been out of Europe before, never been away from home for more than a month.. I've grown so accustomed to that life I've built up here, grown to love it. It's... I don't know, it's home!
But even/especially with that in mind, I think this will only benefit me in so many ways. It's a way to prove my individuality to myself AND to my family/friends. A way to grow even further. I would leave everything I have, to build up something new. NOTHING will be the same: not the environment, not the people, not the language, not the currency, not even myself.
...Seventy days...

Okay, let's move on, shall we? Another thing that I think I should mention, is my 21st birthday, which was already two freakin'months ago. I've been roaming this earth for 21 years already, and this upcoming year sounds all too promising sofar. My friend Armand has this theory that it's all downhill once you hit 20, but I'll prove him wrong! These first two months as a 21-year-old have been pretty damn good to me: I've been to a total of 12 concerts and festivals since my last update, one even better than the other! And we still have 4 to come before I leave, not counting the local events, and the just seem to keep on coming!!
These concerts & festivals have really found a special spot in my life... It's not a secret that I loved attending concerts, but it wasn't untill these last few months that it really grew to this level. I've met so many great new people, had such good times with them, and got to stay in touch with most of them. All thanks to the lovely invention that goes by the name of Last.fm! It's been a while since I went to a concert or festival where someone DIDN'T recognize me! Isn't that funny? :P Ahhh.. I'll miss them/that... But we still have Billy Talent (AGAIN!) 4 days before I leave, and Lowlands a week before that, so I'll get to see most of them before I leave :) I think I'll throw a big party at my place before I leave and I'd really want every one of my closer friends to be there! A few people (Marieke!) in particular.. But I'll be sure to let you all know when and where that'll happen!

Of course, life comes with ups and downs, and I'm glad that mine is no exception. Lately I've been getting these sudden moodswings.. It happens about once or twice a month and every time that I get in that certain mood, I turn into the world's worst pessimist. Last time around, I tried to walk it off like I do with most things but it didn't quite have the result I'd hoped for. Everything and anyone I saw just seemed so... So common. Ordinary. And I start wondering: ...Is this it? Is this what life is all about? You find a partner, get a job, get a car, get a house, a mortgage, insurance, taxes... As you're walking through the rain, you see people driving by, everyone having somewhere they need to be. And for what? Everything just gets.. Engulfed in mediocrity. It's a real moodkiller too, if you're standing in the middle of a club, trust me.
The part of this whole thing that always gets to me the most, is to see how so many people seemingly let their lives revolve around relationships, flings and sex. From the age of 16 (sometimes even younger!!), it's almost as if these relationships are considered some sort of a confirmation of your masculinity or femininity. This can get me so worked up sometimes. Of course, it's nice if a good relationship happens to occur, but too many people take this stuff WAY too seriously. There's so much more to your youth than... Than those fuckin'hormones. I guess what I'm trying to say, is that I think that the importance of a relationship, is one of the most overestimated ideas of our modern day society!

The only direct remedy for these moods that I've been able to find, other than a good night's sleep, is... Well, a good movie! It's incredible how some random movie-producer's made up stories/fairytales can restore your faith in mankind. Of course you know it's all but mere fiction, but somehow it always manages to get the job done.
Then, when the clouds have disappeared from the sky and from your mind, it never takes me too long to remember that everyone just live their lives on a level that they feel comfortable with. To remember that YOU decide what makes you happy. You set your own ideals, and what they mean to you. Whether that's a relationship, a car, or a trip to New Zealand. Relationships obviously mean a lot more to others than they do to me, but does that really have to be a problem? After all, it's a real motivator to make me want to do more with my life. LIKE NEW ZEALAND!

...Or maybe I'm just another prick who likes to generalize other people in order to feel better about myself! :D

That's it for this month. Thanks for reading everyone, sorry it took so long. I missed this. 'till next time!

Current mood: Mellow
Current song playing: Russian Circle - Carpe
Current MSN-name quote: "As screwed up as life can get, at least the smurfs aren't real"

[sighs]

Something else that's really been catching my attention these last few weeks is... Problems. Problems, and the way that people deal with them. Everyone has their own personal issues... I really mean EVERYONE. I bet that there's not one person in the world that doesn't. Strange thought, isn't it. Especially during these last couple of weeks I've really been taking notice of what the people around me consider wrong about their lives. One was having trouble with her relationship, the other's unhappy about lack of a relationship, the other's unhappy with'r looks, the other's having trouble because her ex just started seeing someone else, and... I mean, look around you. Think of what your own friends and loved ones are going through.. Every one of them is facing their own struggle.
I think it's human nature. We need those problems. It's those bumps in the road that make our lives interesting, give it a certain significance. Plus, they really emphasise the happy moments in our lives. The sugar wouldn't be as sweet, without the sour. Or: The Glory of Contrast, as I like to call it. Food tastes better after you've gotten hungry, light seems brighter after darkness, explosions in music are more appreciated after a break, and even insignificant things like taking a dump relieve alot more when you've had to hold it up for a while. Contrast, my friends!! This also reminds me of something Marieke once said, which has really stuck by me.. I'll translate it for you, because it sounds so much better in English ;p

"Embrace your misery,
 for it is the misery that enables the euphoria of the rare blissful moments that make life worthwhile."

(I guess this also kinda explains why I'm so fond of that girl )
Anyway, I hope you understand what I'm getting at. And try to keep this in mind the next time 't you're feeling blue? (note the new theme and it's color ;) )
The thing is, we're never really satisfied! Even if/when we don't have a reason to complain about our current situation, we'd be complaining that we can't get to an even better place. It's never, quite, good enough. But then again: maybe we should be greatful for being like that. Just imagine that we could actually be satisfied with what we have. (Yeah... that'll happen.. [sarcasm]) It would be the end of evolution! We NEED ideals to strive for in order to keep growing. Maybe that's why animals never grew to our level... Maybe it's because they're satisfied with their existing situation, that it CAN be good enough. 'Live their lives at a simpler level, with less contrast... I mean, if you really start thinking about it that way, all evolution has really done for us is make things more complicated... Now we have jobs to chase after, health care insurance, mortgages and other finances, and not to mention our complex sexual traditions. You won't see animals taking the time to ask someone out, no, they just get on top! :P

Current mood: Mellow
Current song playing: Explosions in the Sky - Catastrophe and the Cure
Current MSN-name quote: "What difference does indifference make"